Terms of Use

1. All original content of Dave’s Not Here is copyrighted by Dave’s Not Here’s owner, presently David J. Earney, and is not to be used without permission except as provided herein. In using Dave’s Not Here you recognize that this site is largely the opinion (often misinformed) of the site owner, that all content is provided on an as-is basis (with no warranty offered at time of delivery), and that no factual statement on this site (if they can be found) should be relied upon without further investigation on your part sufficient to satisfy you in your independent judgment that it is true. These terms of use are subject to change, and should be reviewed hourly.

2. Privacy: Dave’s Not Here doesn’t collect any information about you, except in the comments, and then only if you offer it up freely. Dave’s Not Here isn’t even interested in any information about you, your insufferable cats, or your opinions. But my traffic monitoring service and web-host may automatically collect anonymous information about the people and robots who visit this site. Your computer may also collect information about your meanderings around the interwebs, including the fact that you visited Dave’s Not Here. So if you’re paranoid and suffer from any tin-foil hat delusions, you might want to clear your cookies and internet history or use a tool like TOR (The Onion Router) to protect yourself online. Just a thought.

3. Permission is granted to read, quote, cite, link to, print out or otherwise use Dave’s Not Here content, so long as you comply with the terms below.

A. All quotations from Dave’s Not Here will include credit to Dave’s Not Here or to David Earney and, wherever practicable, a hyperlink of the form http://daves-not-here.net/… to the site.

B. In exchange for the access to Dave’s Not Here content described above, you agree not to sue Dave’s Not Here for its content, whether original or linked or quoted from another source, in any court, on any grounds whatsoever in law or equity. Should you violate this agreement by filing such a lawsuit, you agree to pay Dave’s Not Here’s owner or owners the sum of one million dollars ($1,000,000) as liquidated damages, in addition to all attorney’s fees, court costs, and other expenses associated with this litigation, and to indemnify and save harmless Dave’s Not Here and its owners from any damage award made against them in such an action. Should this agreement not to sue be held unenforceable by a court of competent jurisdiction, you agree to binding arbitration, with all arbitration expenses to be paid by you. The arbitration panel shall be composed of three (3) weblog operators selected by Dave’s Not Here’s owners or operators. The award in such arbitration shall be limited to (1) a monetary sum not to exceed $10; and (2) the publication of a retraction on the Dave’s Not Here site. Should this arbitration provision be held unenforceable in a court of competent jurisdiction, you agree to accept as liquidated damages in any lawsuit against Dave’s Not Here the sum of ten dollars ($10), and you agree that you will be entitled to no other relief of any kind in law or equity. You agree that all disputes concerning these terms of use or the content of Dave’s Not Here.net are to be resolved in the courts of Maricopa County, Arizona, under the laws of Arizona and the United States of America.

C. You agree that efforts to obtain Dave’s Not Here content in violation or circumvention of these terms of use constitute a violation of Dave’s Not Here’s copyright and you understand and agree that (1) by virtue of this agreement you are estopped from arguing otherwise: and (2) such violations may lead to civil or criminal penalties.

D. If you are a corporation, you agree to provide, upon the filing of any lawsuit or the mailing of any letter threatening legal action, a bond in the amount of one million dollars ($1,000,000) as security against the liquidated damages provided for in paragraph 3.B. above. If you are an attorney or law firm representing a party filing such lawsuit or causing such a letter to be sent, you agree to provide a bond in the same amount as security against the liquidated damages provided for in paragraph 3.B. above unless you have never accessed, viewed, read, or otherwise made use of Dave’s Not Here content in any form.

4. If you do not agree to these terms of use, exit the site immediately, destroy all copies of Dave’s Not Here content remaining in any form on your computer, any other computer or network device under your control, in print form, or on any information storage or retrieval device that you possess or control. Then execute the following affidavit and contact david@davidearney.com for delivery information.


I hereby certify under penalty of perjury that I possess no copies of the Dave’s Not Here website in any form whatsoever; that neither I nor any employee or associate will access that site in the future in any form whatsoever; that I will immediately destroy any copies of Dave’s Not Here content that happen to come into my possession. I understand that action contrary to these statements constitutes both perjury and a violation of the Dave’s Not Here Terms of Use, subjecting me to possible civil and criminal liability.

Signed (include date)

Witnessed (notary)

Notary Seal:

My commission expires: ______________